knock knock jokes

Will you remember me in an hour?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a day?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a week?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a month?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a year?
Yes.
I think you won't.
Yes, I will.

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
See? You've forgotten me already!

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Barbie.
Barbie who?
Bar-B-Q

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Dwayne.
Dwayne who?
Dwayne the bathtub, I'm dwowning .

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you!
(I love you!)

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to open the door?
(Aren't you going to open the door?)

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Abe!
Abe who?
Abe C D E F G H...!

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Ada!
Ada who?
Ada burger for lunch!

funny talk

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS : Maria!

TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
FRANK : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables!

TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
GLENN : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD : H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
DONALD : Yesterday you said it's H to O!

TEACHER : Winnie, name an important thing we have today, we didn't have 10 years ago.
WINNIE : Me!

TEACHER : Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE : I is...
TEACHER : No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
LOUIS : Because George still had the ax in his hand.

TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

TEACHER : Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, teacher, it's the same dog!

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD : A teacher.

how to spell VIP

head security:remember this parking is for VIP only understand?
assistant security:yes sir l know already!
head security:make sure you remember about this.l don't want to see any problem after this!
assistant security:yes sir!
head security:good!
assistant security:eh, wait sir!
head security:what?
assistant security:how to spell VIP?
head security:what!you ask again!
assistant security:okay sorry sir! l go check dictionary

waitress and stewardess is almost the same!

Many people think that waitress and stewardess is different.Y!because they think that stewardess has to work harder than waitress.But let me tell you stewardess and waitress is almost the same thing.the different is waitress is working in the restaurant,while stewardess is working in the airplane.that's the different only!lf we didn't count on salary,waitress and stewardess is same.Let's see if you are stewardess, l gonna pull the trolley and ask the passenger''good morning/afternoon/evening,sir/madam would you like to have lamb/beef/fish/chicken ?''Later l gonna have to ask again''wold you like beer/tea/coffee/juice or other?''And the most important is we must know how to serve people and smile sweetly.Am l right?While for waitress,lf you are working in 'tin sing restaurant'[Chinese restaurant] . You also have to pull the trolley and ask ''good morning/afternoon sir/miss/madan we have 'sui mai,za sau pau,yi yan'and other.''Later you gonna ask again''would you like to have tea?''And the most important is we must know how to serve people and smile.As the result,waitress and stewardess ia almost the same thing!

ha ha not funny at all

1.one day doraemon said to hello kitty that''l love you''but hello kitty just walk away.why?
answer:because doraemon doesn't have mouth to speak back to doraemon
[lf you think that hello kitty have mouth than see the next number.]
2.one night,hello kitty phone to doraemon say that''l love you'' to doraemon but doraemon just close
the phone.why?
answer:because doraemon doesn't have ear to hear.
[if you think doraemon have ear then is up to you]
3.ah lok:mr.doktor,l have heart attack.
mr.dortor:how come you have heart attack?
ah lok:cause l in love a girl.
mr. doctor:how can a heart attack come from in loving a girl?
ah lok:got you see.if you see a girl you in love in front of you.then love comes from heart!so
suddenly your heart will pump too fast and you will get heart attack understood!
mr doctor:in case at you need to pay twenty billion dollar.
ah lok:what?$